Art Attack
YOU MAY BE THE NEXT VICTIM:
Do You Know the Symptoms?
1. Glazed Eyes
2. Shallow Breathing
3. Clammy Skin
4. Nausea
5. Victim May Smell of Linseed Oil and Formaldehyde
Art Attack victims will usually be found in museums, galleries and Art schools. (Art students have been found to have a propensity for attacks.) The fatal attack may be preceded by the onset of general studio malaise, and an occasional incidence of gallery narcolepsy. When the victim becomes aware of the division between his mundane life and his sanctified Art, he may attempt a self-cure through conceptual Art, punk, or other popular forms of “Anti-Art.” A more effective treatment involves the artist revolutionizing his relationship to the Art World. A simple case may be alleviated with the smashing of a particular work of Art. More advanced cases may require the destruction of entire galleries, museums and Art schools.